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My
doctor said that it is high time I get rid of this object as there is no good
use and a great deal of harm in my continuing to dwell obsessively upon its role
in my life. Yes, this is the frying pan that I was bashed over the head
with in an encounter described in Freddy Goes Camping. I went back to Camphor's
campsite later and appropriated it and certain other objects for evidence should
I ever have decided to press charges against my assailants--which, unfortunately,
I never did before the statute of limitations expired. Proceeds from the sale
of this fantastic item will be applied toward my outrageous monthly prescription
bills. I'm certain that any true Freddyite collector will treasure this keepsake of
the series. It will move quickly at
$500.00
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Here
is your chance to be of service to mankind by helping to promulgate "The Truth."
I will send 100 of my new business cards (secured with a nice fresh red rubber
band) to each of the first fifteen folks who request them. I am making them available
absolutely free owing
to a slight design error which got past the EHA Industries editor-in-chief. "Centerboro"
was left out of the address, but you can easily pencil it in and then strategically
place the cards in hotel lobbies, mass transportation terminals, lunch counters,
supermarket bulletin boards, waiting rooms, etc. I thank you in advance for your
interest in participating in my campaign.
(Sorry.
Supply has been depleted.)
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My
father was a Sovereign cigarette smoker, and he collected the baseball cards that
came with this long-defunct brand. I thought I had thrown this card of his out
a couple of years ago while cleaning out some of his stuff we had stored in my
toolshed when he moved into the home. But it turned up in an envelope I ran across
the other day, so I guess it didn't get tossed after all. It's a pretty old
card, but it's in excellent shape, and I guess a fan of Freddy and the Baseball
Team from Mars might want it as a bookmark and be willing to fork over
$10.00
(Sold)
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Mrs.
U. says I absolutely must sell off these items because they scare her. What we
have here would appeal to any fan of Jinx! First, take a gander at the very
keen black cat Hallowe'en decoration which I hung in one of my front windows every
October 31 for many years. It's still in great, though not perfect shape! Next,
we have a beautiful salt and pepper shaker set which I'd set out just once a year
for my birthday party. For the lot, I propose a self-insulting price of
$249.99
(Sold)
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Front View
Back View
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This
is the Model P10 Wurlitzer juke box which had been in Dixon Diner's since the
mid-'30s. I obtained it when I helped Mr. Dixon sell his business. The walnut
cabinet is in better than good condition, but the box is, alas, not working.
It appears to have all the parts, and I do know that the tubes are still
good. Here's your chance to renovate a real gem and spin those old 78s for only
$2950.00
(Shipping charges will be extra and hefty!)
(Sold)
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I received a large number
of e-mails from disappointed Freddyites who were not quick enough to obtain the
autographed Freddy the Pilot in Lot #1. Ordinarily I would say, "Tough
luck and poop-poop-a-doop!" However, I am offering an unpreviewed, not-previously-announced
1945 autographed Ignormus so that everyone will feel he or she has had
an equal chance at what I consider a relatively insignificant item. This book
is in what I would describe as B+ condition, but the signature is a truly fine
one. This might be the last signed Freddy book I will ever offer. So, Freddyites,
here's your fair and perhaps final opportunity to obtain a Grail of the
Freddyverse! Hurry before this item slips through your fingers at a most reasonable
$2.00
(Sold)
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Although
this splendid felt pennant is about 50 years old, it's still in mint condition
except for a few virtually unnoticeable thumbtack holes. Could any enthusiast
of the Freddy series resist this fabulous memento from the end of Centerboro's
golden age? No, sir, so you'd better hurry, because I can already hear the frenzied
rush to snap this article up for
$314.16
(Sold)
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These
two roadmaps are sure to attract the interest of Freddyites who tell me that they
simply cannot find that "good map" I've said would be necessary to locate
Centerboro, New York. Well, these old Sinclair and Gulf maps will do the
trick very nicely. The maps have been used and cannot be considered of "collectible"
grade. And although neither of them shows the New York State Thruway, which hadn't
been built when they were printed, Centerboro is easily found in each. For this
useful and especially charming pair of maps, I ask
$10.00
(Sold)
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This
curious item is certain to cause my mailbox to become quite clogged with inquiries
once the Freddyites get wind of it, so if you really want it, you'd better get
the lead out! I found it in one of the Bean family scrapbooks I rescued from the
big fire, and I believe it to have belonged to Freddy himself, as his name is
childishly scrawled on the inside cover of this cereal premium from 1932, a 5"
X 7" 16-page booklet given away by Post Cereals. Is it more than just a coincidence
that Freddy the Detective was published in 1932? Beats me! In any case,
I think this incredible find is worth every single penny of
$599.99
(Sold)
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A
slightly macabre item to be sure, this must be the glass eye referred to
as having been found in the garden by Mr. Bean (Pilot, p. 105). I noticed
it in a cigar box full of odds and ends at the Bean farm "fire"sale, and, for
some unfathomable reason, I bought it from William, who had employed it as a good
luck piece, for a couple of bucks. Probably the strangest Freddy collectible
you're ever likely to see, it's going to be plucked quickly for what I believe
it might be worth now as a specimen of Freddiana:
$456.78
(Sold)
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And lastly, here are a couple
of little things from my extensive Martian collection of over 2000 items which
I am beginning to sell off because (1) my doctor says I have to and (2) I have
to spend an exaggerated amount of time dusting it all anyway. If you have to ask
whose autographed picture that is, you don't really need it. The "Martian Hop"
is quite lively, but the tune will lodge itself inextricably in your consciousness
for several days, so I do not recommend that you play it very often, especially
after imbibing an excess of caffeine or just before bedtime. You may take either
of these collectibles for
$75.00 or both for $149.99!
(Sold)
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